Memorial Service for Greg Haslam

On Saturday 6th November we will be holding a memorial service for dad. We buried him in September with a grave-side service in Winchester for the extended family. So, this memorial service is an opportunity to join with friends and celebrate dad’s life.

This is very much an open invitation event to anyone who would like to attend. A few people have asked if we will be live-streaming, but the answer is unfortunately no. This is mainly because of the technical challenge being in a venue we don’t own.

Here are the details:

Saturday, 6th November at 1.30–4.30pm

Emmanuel Centre,
Marsham Street,
London, SW1P 3DW

It is helpful, but not necessary, if you can RSVP. This will give us a better idea on numbers.

Doors will open at 1.30pm, and the service will begin at 2pm. After the service is over, we’ll be offering some light refreshments so that there’s an opportunity to chat. And, as I said, all are welcome!

On dad’s passing

greg haslam.jpg

Click here for details for the Memorial Service

Yesterday morning, on Friday 20 August, my dad (Greg Haslam) went to be with Jesus. He died in his home with his family and nurses caring for him. He was 68 years of age. He is survived by his wife, Ruth, his three sons, his three daughters-in-law, and ten grandchildren.

Five years ago, at age 63, dad had received a diagnosis of early onset Alzheimer’s. It was a heavy blow to us as his family, and dad was tearful but resilient and brave. At no point did he express anything like self-pity or anger at his situation though he was obviously sad at times. He retired from his ministry the day after his diagnosis, and my mum became his full-time carer; a role she has performed with such exceptional devotion every single day since.

It is impossible to sum up the experiences of the past five years as we have watched his mind and his capacities disappear so rapidly and so relentlessly. We have grieved often and deeply at the gradual loss that has taken place before our eyes, unable to pause his decline or turn back the clock. You might think that we would have been ready for his passing after all these years, but his death has hit us all with fresh grief and we are truly heartbroken.

Dad was loved by many, many people. We have received a flood of messages from lives he touched, whether as a friend or as a preacher and pastor. These messages are being shared among the family, and that has been healing. The tragedy of dementia is the sense of loss, that something so precious and irreplaceable is slipping away. Reading messages from near and far reminds us of the man he was, of all he accomplished, and of how God used him to transform lives.

Dad was a rare and exceptionally gifted person, so full of conviction, tenacity, compassion, insight, wit, and courage. Growing up in Bootle, Liverpool, in a broken home, there was no indication he would have become a preacher. His family were not churchgoers, nor were they Christian. But he began reading voraciously in his teen years, not long after he became a Christian at age 14 after hearing Billy Graham preach. As he discovered influences like C. H. Spurgeon and Dr. Martyn Lloyd-Jones, it is no exaggeration to say that books changed the direction of his life.

He soon felt called by God to be a preacher – a fact he did not divulge to my mum until after they were married! This calling eventually brought them to London where he trained for ministry, then to Winchester where he led a church for 21 years, and then back to London where he pastored for a further 14 years.

There was an urgency in his desire to preach Christ. This urgency of calling did not diminish but rather grew with each passing year of his ministry. As we listened to him expound the Scriptures, hearts began to burn, and that ignition warmed so many with love for Christ. His natural gifts, including his sharp intellect, eloquence, and clarity of expression, were inflamed by passion and captivation with the gospel, and with the grace of God’s Holy Spirit. It was this rare combination of careful and logical preaching, enlivened by a living reliance on the Holy Spirit, that made him so compelling and rare. He was a messenger, and he was burdened with a prophetic message and a duty he simply had to discharge. He felt that knowing Jesus was the greatest privilege imaginable, and he wanted others to find the love that had so captivated him.

What many knew of dad in public was true of him in private. His life was marked by integrity and sincerity. He was the same man, through and through. As I have reflected over the years, I think this is the main reason why my brothers and I were able to listen to him – whether at church among hundreds or over dinner with the family – and take seriously all that he believed and spoke about. Where many pastors’ kids feel the burden of performance that turns into resentment, I can say that I felt nothing but the privilege of getting to be with dad all the time and not just on Sundays. I know I speak for my brothers, James and Joshua, in expressing this.

I feel I am only just getting going. Perhaps at some point I will have the opportunity to write more. In the meantime, I would be so grateful to read more stories and to share them with the family. Please do email me.

Saying goodbye to dad has been unbelievably difficult. There is a giant, gaping hole in our hearts, and it aches to think of all that we have lost. His laughter, his kindness, his wisdom; all that he was has left an indelible mark upon us, but we just miss him so, so much. And yet, our grief is infused with hope. We do not grieve as others do who have no hope (1 Thessalonians 4.13). There is relief in knowing that his suffering has ended, and that he’s with Jesus, and that we will see him again one day.

The secret to Paul’s success

Towards the very end of Tom Wright’s book, Paul, A Biography, he ask the question, What is the reason for Paul’s success? ‘In particular, what was it about Paul the man that made him – let’s face it – one of the most successful public intellectuals of all time?’

The answers he gives are challenging and provocative. First, Wright says it is Paul’s sheer energy. He is relentless. He is moving from one situation to another, often in danger, and never really stopping. He is visiting households, writing letters, working for a living, preparing what to say in his next address, praying, and so on.

Second, he mentions ‘his blunt, up-front habit of telling it as he sees it no matter who is confronting him’. He’s willing to confront people (including friends), stand before authorities, engage in debate, address mobs of hostile opponents. ‘He is the kind of man you want on your side in a debate but who may just alienate more sensitive souls.’ This forcefulness of personality meant that ‘As a companion, he must have been exhilarating when things were going well and exasperating when they weren’t. As an opponent, he could cause some people to contemplate murder as their only recourse.’

Wright goes on:

People today write doctoral dissertations and business books about how successful companies and not-for-profit organizations begin. In ninety-nine cases out of a hundred there is someone like Paul hammering away from the start, getting things off the ground, confronting local authorities, raising money, persuading co-workers about what needs to be done, never losing the vision. Someone who will take the bull by the horns. Someone who will go on and on insisting on what to do and how to do it until it happens.

Then, he mentions another quality in Paul – his disarming vulnerability. Although he’s constantly working with an ‘in-your-face energy’, nevertheless, he is deeply loved by those around him. He has an open heart, loving the churches and people he ministered to. He’s honest and real, and he doesn’t ask anything of anyone that he wasn’t himself willing to do. 

When he says he was gentle as a nurse in Thessalonica, we believe him. When he writes the poem about love, we know that the Corinthians would have recognized a self-portrait. When he tells the Philippians, over and over, to rejoice and celebrate, they know that, given half a chance, he would be the life and soul of the party. He modeled what he taught, and what he taught was the utter, exuberant, self-giving love of the Messiah.

Finally, Wright points out that Paul’s continuing influence is explained (of course!) by his letters. Somehow, by the grace of God, in less than 80 pages of an average Bible, we have enough of the mind of this saintly Apostle as he addresses all kinds of different situations and circumstances, that his Christlike influence has permeated throughout the church ever since. And many great figures in church history have been formed agains the anvil of Paul’s writings.

And what would Paul say was the secret to his success? ‘Paul himself would say that the One God was behind it all.’

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Converse Christianity – a new podcast

We may be a little late to this party, but Jeremy Moses and I have been recording a podcast and it launched just a couple of weeks ago. The strap-line captures the essence of our intention with each episode – to explore how to live out a countercultural faith in a secular age.

Besides being pastors together at Grace London, Jeremy and I are great friends, and we can and do talk for hours on theological and cultural issues in our normal day-to-day interactions. One of the passions that we share is a desire to articulate a vision of the Christian life that calls for radical commitment and distinctiveness. When a lot of churches and Christians are doing their best to fit in, we feel convinced that it is our difference that makes the faith attractive. Jesus was a radical; we should be too.

So far we’ve recorded episodes on sex, social media, church, rest, and the body. We have a lot more planned, and we hope to keep releasing them on a weekly basis to begin with. That is, until we run out of things to say (a vain hope for many of our regular hearers on Sundays).

You can find some key links to the podcast here on the church website. I’d love to hear any reflections or responses, and indeed, if you have any topics you want us to talk about, get in touch!